February 18, 2016

When I get the sad's I retreat, cherish alone time, lose my creativity, go silent.....

There has been much sadness around me lately and I feel others pain, often being too sensitive. A long time family in town lost one of it's members, a vibrant 18 year old, hit by a drunken driver. A beautiful woman came into the shop yesterday seeking retail therapy, her sister just passed due to a brain aneurism. And on and on.........I will dust myself off and begin to appreciate anew all of life's blessings, and I am very blessed. But first I need to deal with my personal sadness, the impending loss of my sweet pooch, Cooper. In comparison to other people's losses, I feel foolish, but nonetheless, feel, deeply
How is this for silly? My sister and I were playing with him and oddly, he went along with the dress up!
He quickly tired of our nonsense and went back to his favorite pastime; watching TV. Yep, "Pitbulls and Parolees" is his fav.

So many of you wrote, asked how he is doing, thank you.

All changed when I picked him up from his last chemo treatment, "Watch him closely, it could be 2-4 or more months".  "Watch for what?" I asked......."Recurrent tumors, you know he does not have long"

Why my shock? His original oncologist, long since gone from the practice, said "This treatment will cure him, he will die of old age not Lymphoma"
She was rogue, she apparently told this to others, I was stunned.

So tell me dear readers..........what do you do to get out of a funk? A time of burrowing? Sadness and silence?
After far too many years, I know that TIME is the answer, always is, just wondering who has any wisdom for these times in life?

I will say that I am at home as much as possible to be with Cooper while working on the computer, but for a spot of time yesterday I did lose myself in some creativity and it was a balm to my soul. Maybe that is the answer, jump back in. this may seem like an odd segue but it did help
 What do you think? My first abstract art
 Here is a try on a piece of burlap, do you love the crackling/old world effect? This could be stretched on a canvas.
 Up close you can see the effect of gold leaf. Forever I have dreamed of being an artist, a canvas artist, suddenly I feel empowered
Here is Margaret's first try.
                                                        Guess What? This is easy!!

If you are local, we are teaching this class on March 17th from 5-8pm. And, you will go home with your own art, ready to hang. This is a combination of Venetian Plaster, Pigments, Mica Powders and wax. NO EXPERIENCE NECESSARY.......really
    To register call; 630.232.1303

                      And to you my friends, thank you for listening. Thank you for caring

                                                          xoxo    Debra


  1. Cooper is adorable. Give him a kiss for me.

  2. I am so sorry to hear about senseless tragedy like that...

    On the flip side it is heartwarming to see a doggie into tv like me and your abstract is lovely

  3. Debra,
    I pray your sweet Cooper surprises the vet and hangs in there for a very long time. These furry friends are very much a part of family and of course there is sadness when they are not well. Give yourself time to be sad...it's okay. The creative part makes sense to me, that is my go-to for feeling better in a time of sadness. Beauty through art and creativity always makes me feel better.
    I love your painting. Wish I could take the class you're offering.
    Give Cooper a big hug from a fellow dog owner/lover.
    Have a restful weekend, my friend.

  4. Please know your not alone...happen to be going through same emotional period. I was in the store yesterday and picked up a few items to make a friend smile, as well as a treat for myself. Sometimes when you go inward you find your strength and re-emerge as a stronger,more thoughtful and more creative person. It's a time of healing. Hang in there.

  5. Sending concern, strength and prayers....dogs teach us so much about life.

    You are an artist. The pieces are lovely and thought-provoking.

  6. Dear Debra, I know how very sad it is to watch your beautiful Cooper become so ill.
    It may sound cruel to you at this time but speaking from experience it would be a good idea if you would plan on getting a little puppy. Maybe not right now but in a little while. Little puppies are so needy and take up so much time. They have a way of helping you get over so much sadness. ox, Gina

  7. So sorry for your Cooper. He is happy and warm in your care and that is all he wants! Many Vets prescribe chemo for their patients, knowing full well that it will likely not extend a dog's life or cure the cancer. Our Andy died of cancer almost 2 years ago. His Vet prescribed treatment immediately upon the diagnosis. I got a second opinion from a female vet that was a very warm and frank person. She said that the best way to proceed was to just spoil our sweetheart for as long as he lasted, which was 6 months following diagnosis. There is a whole lot of profit in Chemo and surgery. We did all the things he loved, hikes, beach visits, treats, hugs, what a fun 6 months it was for the two of us and our family even though it was very sad.

  8. I am a longtime reader but rarely comment. You should not feel foolish about the sadness of losing your pet - he is your family. And I really think sometimes the best thing to do is feel sad - that is a part of life - and it should be felt too. It is really just a tribute to how much you care. Sending good thoughts...

  9. Debra, PLEASE...contact Dr. Ann Jeglum http://www.vosrc.net/, (610) 692–6272.
    She has pioneered work on lymphoma through immunobiology. This is not one of the "factory" canine chemo centers. She is a true Harvard educated genius with NIH grants and decades of pioneering work in canine lymphomas. She may not be able to help, but you never know.

  10. I lost a dear treasured friend of 60 years recently. This was beyond tears. The grief too stabing to endure. I turned the pictures of him down, I took away the displayed gifts. I felt disloyal but could not endure the pain.

  11. oh Debra, this post made me so sad. Cooper has the sweetest face... I love him from afar. And yes, I have also felt the heartache of losing a precious family dog so I can imagine how you feel. I do remember a dear friend and fellow dog lover talking to me when I was in the fog of loss and sadness after Sierra was gone. For some reason it helped. She reminded me of the incredible love and warmth and happiness we surrounded Sierra with throughout her life so that really that was all she knew. Thinking of that love she felt made me feel better, although it didn't take the sting out of missing her. I know the Buddhists say that suffering doesn't happen from our losses, it happens from our clinging. Trying to hold on and fighting change. I struggle too with the holding on, wish it was easier for us to simply appreciate the present moment and all the joy right in front of us. Sending you prayers for strength and acceptance.

  12. dear unknown
    i weep for you, such grief and loss. hugs to you

    dear all, i am so touched by your kindness, shared experiences and well wishes
    blessings to all

  13. dear GRC, ltd.
    THANK YOU! i am in contact, i was not aware of this doctor, organization or their options

  14. Aaahhh So hard dealing with your beloved dog's illness. I really feel your pain. But I love your abstract works - so good things can come from bad! xx Sharon

  15. Debra, I want to weep for you, your Cooper's sweet face reminds me of my sweet Munchen who I put down in August afar almost 15 years. We are pretty sure that she had dance but did not have it diagnosed as to vet said she was almost 15, and had Cushings and they would not try to prolong her life like that.

    You are doing the best thing for both of you, spending as munch time as you can with your treasured baby, you are right to be sad. Cooper is a very dear and treasured member of your family, he is your family. The pain of loosing him will be the same as if you lost a family member. Love like that causes pain. I was a wreck, and frankly other than taking the other 2 dogs out to relieve themselves, I did not get off the couch for 4 days. I creed, steamed, weeped and more. Munchen is/was my child.

    I will have you in my prayers, and Cooper as well. Take care of yourself!

    Love the new art! One of these days we are going to meet!

  16. Last year seemed to have been terribly hard for so many people, plus January is always dreary and depressing. Cooper looks so sweet. Cherish your time with him and know that you have given him the great gift of a good life.

  17. Dear Debra, I am so sorry to hear this. It is so hard when difficult times seem to just pile on! I do understand and am keeping you in my thoughts and prayers. Love that you are painting, also self care is so important..
    The Arts by Karena


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...